About a month and a half ago one of my friend's dad passed away. Two weeks ago today, they gave him a beautiful celebration of life ceremony. Friends, family, and co-workers came together to pay their respects and remember the life that he lived, and the effect that he had on people.
I knew this man for about 15 years having played in a band with his youngest son and having gone to high school with his daughter. But I didn’t really “know” him, which is to say, I never really had in-depth conversations with him. Until about two years ago.
I was standing at the train station waiting to go home when he happened to walk past me. I said “Hi” to him and we chatted for about 15 minutes. We talked about life, work, and other general things. I don’t remember what we said specifically, but as he said goodbye and walked further on down the platform, I remember feeling good about how that was the first “real” conversation that we had.
As I was sitting in the hall during the ceremony two weeks ago, I heard about how he was a musician, a friend, a scoutmaster, a director of IT, a business owner, a father, and a husband. But after hearing stories from multiple people that knew him, it became very clear that he was a leader in every facet of his life. But his style of leadership was soft-spoken, unassuming and he used (I believe) his actions more than his words.
After remembering our conversation at the train station, the stories that I heard started to remind me of a quote by Maya Angelou:
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
He cared about and believed in people so much, that it helped others believe in themselves. That is a very valuable gift to give to someone. There is no amount of money or any external object that can provide that.
To me he is an example of “speak softly, but carry a big stick”, and those that knew him will remember him for his kindness and the positive effect that he had. Those are values that we can all take lessons from.
Here’s to a good man, RIP Henry White.
Originally published at audiofr3ak.blogspot.com on August 24th, 2014.
